Yuav ua li cas pab koj tus menyuam tiv thaiv kev npau taws

Khawv koob kab lus 1: "Koj muaj cai npau taws"

Yog hais tias nws mus rau hauv ib qho kev sib tw, yuav muaj ib qho laj thawj. "Kev npau taws tso cai rau nws hais tias qee yam cuam tshuam rau hauv nws," piav qhia tus kws qhia niam txiv Nina Bataille. Tsis tas li ntawd, tsis kam lees qhov kev xav yog txoj hauv kev zoo tshaj plaws los txhawb nws. Peb cov lus qhia: txais tos nws qhov kev ntxhov siab nrog kev mloog zoo. Nws tsis zoo siab vim ib tug neeg nyiag nws cov khoom ua si? Qhia rau nws tias koj nkag siab nws. Paub tias ib tug neeg tab tom qhia lawv txoj kev xav yuav pab kom lawv siab.

Khawv koob 2: “Cia li los rau hauv kuv txhais tes! “

Thaum ib tug me nyuam tawg, nws tsis yooj yim sua kom nrhiav tau txoj hauv kev los ua kom siab. Nws yog lub hauv paus ntawm kev ntxhov siab rau nws uas nws tswj hwm qhov kev kub ntxhov thiab nthuav dav nws… Kom nplij nws, tsis muaj dab tsi zoo li puag. Gestures ntawm rhiab heev txhawb lub secretion ntawm oxytocin, lub Symptoms Hormone, uas muab ib tug tam sim ntawd kev xav ntawm calm. Lawv kuj muaj txiaj ntsig zoo rau lub sijhawm ntev. "Qhov ntau koj ua rau nws lub siab xav, qhov ntau koj yuav ua rau nws muaj zog los ntsib kev nyuaj thiab tswj nws tus cwj pwm tom qab," qhia tus kws qhia.

Khawv koob kab lus 3: "Gosh, nws ua li no rau koj?" “

Raws li cov me nyuam yaus tsis muaj kev xav txog tej yam, lawv tuaj yeem hnov ​​​​mob rau cov me nyuam yaus. Txhawm rau pab lawv ua yeeb yaj kiab, tsis txhob tos kom hnov ​​​​mob ntawm ko taw tsis raug, tsuas yog coj me ntsis lightness rau qhov xwm txheej. Thaum nws rov qab los ntawm nws zaj lus qhia piano, nws yws tias nws tus kws qhia muab ob daim me me los tshuaj xyuas, thiab nws ntaus nws txhais taw kom tsis txhob rov mus kawm? Ua si daim npav lom zem: "Gosh, nws yuav ua li cas thiaj tuaj yeem ua tau li ntawd?" Nws yuav qhia nws kom muab tej yam hauv kev xav.

Khawv koob kab lus 4: "Thaum koj npaj txhij, koj tuaj yeem tuaj nrog kuv tham"

Nws puas ua ntsej muag? Tsis txhob sim yuam kev sib tham tam sim ntawd. Nina Bataille hais tias "Nws tsis yog vim koj qhia nws tias koj tuaj yeem tham tau tias nws yog," Nina Bataille hais. Muab sijhawm rau nws zom nws txoj kev npau taws thiab ua lub luag haujlwm rau thaum nws rov los cuag koj. Qhov tseem ceeb yog kom ib txwm qhib lub qhov rooj. Nws kaw nws tus kheej hauv sulking? Muab tus ncej tshiab rau nws kawg ntawm ib lub hlis twg ntawm ib teev: "Puas yog qhov phem uas peb tsis mus rau qhov zoo siab-mus-ncig tav su no?" Tab sis qhov tseem ceeb tshaj, nyob ruaj khov ntawm koj txoj haujlwm. Yog tias koj muab rau nws, nws yuav sulk tsis tu ncua kom tau raws li nws xav tau.

Khawv koob kab lus 5: “Nestor tus beaver xav li cas? “

Ua qhov kev xeem: lob nws lub blankie thiab ua rau nws hais txawm tias koj muaj teeb meem kom koj tus menyuam hnov. Koj yuav pom, cov ntsiav tshuaj yuav ua haujlwm zoo dua. Nina Bataille piav qhia tias "Cov pam vov yog cov khoom hloov pauv, uas tso cai rau tus menyuam tso khoom ntawm qhov deb", piav qhia Nina Bataille. Yog li tsis txhob yig, siv nws!

Khawv koob kab lus 6: "Hauv koj qhov chaw, kuv yuav ua tam sim ntawd, tab sis nws yog koj tus uas pom"

Tsis muaj dab tsi ua. Txhua zaus koj hais kom nws teem lub rooj, nws tso ib qho kev tawm tsam. "Nws yog tus yam ntxwv ntawm cov menyuam yaus nrog lub siab ntev ntawm cov thawj coj pob: lawv ntxub kev txiav txim siab thiab ib txwm nrhiav kom tau txais lub zog siab," sau tseg Nina Bataille. Qhov tseem ceeb tshaj, tsis txhob chim thiab ua si nyias. Ua rau nws xav tias nws yuav txiav txim siab. Txhua yam koj yuav tsum ua yog hais rau nws hauv lub suab uas yog ob qho tib si siab thiab ruaj khov: "Hauv koj qhov chaw, kuv yuav ua tam sim ntawd, tab sis nws yog koj tus uas pom". Koj yuav pom, txawm nws tsis zoo siab los nws yuav ua li koj hais kom nws ua.

Khawv koob 7: "Zoo, koj tau ua tiav"

"Raws li cov niam txiv, peb kuj muaj lub luag haujlwm ntawm tus kws qhia ua si rau peb cov menyuam," Nina Bataille nco qab. Koj tus me nyuam puas tau tswj kom nws txias hauv qhov xwm txheej uas tuaj yeem degenerated, lossis degenerated txog tam sim no? Nws yeej tsim nyog yuav tsum tau qhia. Kev qhuas nws yuav tsis tsuas txhawb kom nws rov ua tus cwj pwm no, tab sis koj tseem yuav txhawb nqa nws tus kheej.

Khawv koob 8: "Koj puas yog frowning, koj puas npau taws?" “

Kom kawm tswj koj txoj kev npau taws, koj tseem yuav tsum paub tias koj npau taws. Txhawm rau pab nws kom paub txog qhov kev xav no, saib xyuas piav qhia txog cov cim qhia thiab lub cev tshwm sim: "Koj tab tom qw", "koj lub ntsej muag liab tag nrho", "koj ua tsis taus pa sai", "koj muaj pob hauv koj lub plab" Yam tsawg kawg nkaus rau qhov muaj zog tshaj plaws: ua siab ntev, tsis txaus siab, chim siab, dhuav, chim siab, npau taws, npau taws… Muab lo lus rau nws txoj kev xav yuav pab nws tswj nws tus kheej zoo dua.

Khawv koob 9: “Mus khiav! “

Tsis muaj dab tsi zoo li khiav lossis ncaws pob kawm kom channel koj lub siab xav, npau taws hauv siab! Kev ua si lub cev muaj ob qhov zoo ntawm kev noj cortisol, kev ntxhov siab vector, thiab tsim cov endorphin, cov tshuaj hormones txaus siab. Puas yog koj tus menyuam tsis ua kis las? Kev kos duab, sau ntawv thiab hu nkauj kuj ua haujlwm zoo heev rau kev tawm tsam kev ua phem.

Khawv koob 10: "Kuv hais rau koj nrog kev hwm, Kuv cia siab tias tib yam ntawm koj rov qab los!" “

Txij li thaum koj ua kev hwm rau koj tus menyuam, ob qho tib si ntawm cov lus koj siv thiab tus cwj pwm koj coj nrog nws, peb yeej tsim nyog thov tib yam los ntawm nws. Yog tias nws hla txoj kab, tsis txhob cia nws mus. Hais kom nws rov hais nws cov lus.

Khawv koob 11: “Tau! “

Tau kawg, tsis muaj lus nug txog cia nws ua qhov nws xav tau. Txawm li cas los xij, tsis txhob hais "tsis yog" txhua lub sijhawm. Tshaj tawm feem ntau ntawm lub suab hais lus thuam, "tsis yog" yuav nyiam ua kom nws qhov kev chim siab thiab yog li ua rau nws ntxhov siab. Nyiam lo lus "stop", uas muaj qhov zoo ntawm kev txwv tus menyuam hauv nws txoj kev tsis ua rau nws xav tias txhaum.

Khawv koob 12: "Ok, koj ua yuam kev, tab sis koj tseem yog ib tug neeg zoo!" “

Nws tsuas yog yuav tsum plam thaum nws kos duab, thiab qhov ntawd yog qhov xwm txheej: nws npau taws thiab kua muag daim ntawv nrog npau taws! Koj tus tub tsis tuaj yeem sawv los ua qhov yuam kev me me. Tsis xav tsis thoob. "Peb nyob hauv ib lub zej zog uas cov kab lis kev cai ntawm kev ua yuam kev tsis yog nyob rau hauv tag nrho cov tsim: peb cov me nyuam yuav tsum tau ua tiav nyob rau hauv thawj zaug sim yog hais tias lawv tsis xav kom dhau mus rau loosers", tu siab Nina Bataille. Yog li ntawd nws yog nyob ntawm koj yuav tsum nco ntsoov nws kev ua tsis tiav qhia tias txhua tus muaj cai ua yuam kev, thiab txawm tias nws tsis yog lawm, nws tsis yog null rau tag nrho cov ntawd. Txhawm rau thim rov qab, nws yuav tsum tau txais qhov tsawg kawg ntawm kev ntseeg tus kheej ...