Ib tug me nyuam txoj kev quaj ntsuag tuaj yeem muaj ntau yam kev xav: qaug zog, nqhis dej, tsis xis nyob, xav tau cov neeg laus saib xyuas ... Cov hauj lwm ntawm cov niam txiv yog to taub qhov laj thawj thiab, qhov tseem ceeb tshaj, qhia nws tswj nws txoj kev xav. Raws li tus kws tshawb fawb txog kev puas siab puas ntsws Guy Winch, tus me nyuam muaj plaub xyoos tuaj yeem tshem tawm cov lus tsis txaus siab ntawm nws cov lus. Yuav pab nws ua li cas?
Cov me nyuam yaus kawm qw qw ib puag ncig lawv tuaj yeem hais tau tag nrho cov kab lus, lossis txawm tias ntxov dua. Qee tus tau tshem tus cwj pwm no los ntawm qib thawj lossis qib thib ob, thaum lwm tus khaws nws ntev dua. Txawm li cas los xij, ob peb tus neeg nyob ib puag ncig muaj peev xwm tiv taus qhov kev ntxhov siab rau lub sijhawm ntev.
Cov niam txiv feem ntau ua li cas rau nws? Feem ntau thov los yog thov los ntawm tus tub (tus ntxhais) kom tsis txhob ua tam sim ntawd. Los yog lawv pom kev khaus khaus hauv txhua txoj hauv kev, tab sis qhov no tsis zoo li yuav tiv thaiv tus menyuam los ntawm kev ntxhib los mos yog tias nws chim siab, nkees, tshaib plab lossis tsis xis nyob.
Nws yog ib qho nyuaj rau tus menyuam kawm ntawv preschool los tswj nws tus cwj pwm, tab sis thaum muaj hnub nyoog peb lossis plaub xyoos, nws twb muaj peev xwm hais tib lo lus hauv lub suab qis dua. Tib lo lus nug yog yuav ua li cas kom nws hloov nws lub suab nrov.
Luckily, muaj ib qho yooj yim ua kom yuam kev uas cov niam txiv tuaj yeem siv los txiav lawv tus menyuam tawm ntawm tus cwj pwm phem no. Ntau tus neeg laus paub txog cov txheej txheem no, tab sis feem ntau ua tsis tiav thaum lawv sim siv nws, vim tias lawv tsis ua raws li qhov tseem ceeb tshaj plaws: hauv kev lag luam ntawm kev teeb tsa ciam teb thiab hloov tus cwj pwm, peb yuav tsum yog 100% kev xav thiab zoo ib yam.
Tsib kauj ruam kom txhob whining
1. Thaum twg koj tus me nyuam tig rau lub whimper, hais nrog luag nyav (kom qhia tias koj tsis npau taws), "Kuv thov txim, tab sis tam sim no koj lub suab nrov heev uas kuv pob ntseg hnov tsis zoo. Yog li thov rov hais dua rau tus tub loj / ntxhais lub suab. "
2. Yog hais tias tus me nyuam tseem qw nrov nrov, muab koj txhais tes rau hauv pob ntseg thiab rov hais luag ntxhi: “Kuv paub tias koj tab tom hais ib yam dab tsi, tab sis kuv pob ntseg tsis kam ua haujlwm. Koj puas tuaj yeem hais tib yam hauv ib tus ntxhais loj / tus tub lub suab?
3. Yog hais tias tus me nyuam hloov lub suab mus rau ib tug whiny, hais tias, "Tam sim no kuv hnov koj. Ua tsaug rau koj tham nrog kuv zoo li ib tug ntxhais loj / tub. " Thiab nco ntsoov teb nws qhov kev thov. Los sis txawm hais ib yam dab tsi zoo li, "Kuv pob ntseg zoo siab thaum koj siv koj tus ntxhais loj / tub lub suab."
4. Yog tias koj tus menyuam tseem tab tom quaj tom qab ob qhov kev thov, rub koj lub xub pwg nyom thiab tig mus, tsis quav ntsej nws qhov kev thov kom txog thaum nws qhia nws lub siab nyiam yam tsis muaj whining.
5. Yog hais tias tus whimper tig mus rau hauv lub suab nrov, hais tias, “Kuv xav hnov koj—Kuv yeej ua tau. Tab sis kuv pob ntseg xav tau kev pab. Lawv xav kom koj hais lus hauv ib tug tub loj / ntxhais lub suab. " Yog tias koj pom tias tus menyuam tab tom sim hloov intonation thiab hais lus ntau dua, rov qab mus rau qib peb.
Koj lub hom phiaj yog txhawm rau txhim kho tus cwj pwm ntse, yog li nws tseem ceeb heev kom ua kev zoo siab thiab muab nqi zog rau koj tus menyuam thaum ntxov.
Cov xwm txheej tseem ceeb
1. Rau cov txheej txheem no ua haujlwm, koj thiab koj tus khub (yog tias koj muaj) yuav tsum tau teb tib yam nkaus kom txog thaum tus menyuam tus cwj pwm hloov. Qhov ntau pheej thiab ruaj khov, qhov no yuav tshwm sim sai dua.
2. Txhawm rau kom tsis txhob muaj kev tawm tsam nrog koj tus menyuam, sim ua kom koj lub suab nrov, txawm tias ua tau, thiab txhawb nws thaum twg koj thov.
3. Nco ntsoov rov qab nws cov kev siv zog nrog cov lus pom zoo hais ib zaug (raws li hauv cov piv txwv ntawm point 3).
4. Tsis txhob tso tseg koj qhov kev xav tau thiab tsis txhob txo koj qhov kev cia siab thaum koj pom tias tus menyuam pib siv zog ua kom tsis muaj zog. Nco ntsoov nco ntsoov nws ntawm koj qhov kev thov kom hais tias "loj npaum li cas" kom txog thaum nws lub suab nrov dua.
5. Lub calmer koj hnov qab, qhov yooj yim dua nws yuav yog rau tus menyuam kom tsom mus rau txoj haujlwm ntawm tes. Txwv tsis pub, los ntawm kev pom lub siab lub ntsws teb rau lawv qhov whining, tus menyuam kawm ntawv preschool yuav txhawb nqa tus cwj pwm phem.
Txog tus sau: Guy Winch yog tus kws kho mob hlwb, tus tswv cuab ntawm American Psychological Association, thiab sau ntau phau ntawv, ib qho yog Psychological First Aid (Medley, 2014).