txheem
Lub ntsej muag thiab tawv ncauj ntawm cov menyuam hnub nyoog 2-3 xyoos, yuav ua li cas nrog lawv
Tsis ntev los sis tom qab nws tshwm sim: ib tag kis zoo, tsis yog me nyuam mos qab zib, dab ntxwg nyoog tawv ncauj sawv. Ib tus neeg tawm tswv yim los qhia tus menyuam rau tus kws kho kev puas siab ntsws, ib tus neeg - kom muaj txoj sia nyob thaum muaj teeb meem hnub nyoog tom ntej. Yog li leej twg yog?
Nws hloov tawm tias ntau tus menyuam qhov kev xav tsis meej yog qhov ib txwm muaj, txawm hais tias lawv ua rau cov neeg laus npau taws heev. Peb tau sau yim qhov piv txwv feem ntau. Txheeb xyuas: yog tias koj tus menyuam muab qee yam zoo li ntawd, tom qab ntawd koj yuav tsum kho koj tus cwj pwm, lossis tsuas yog ua pa, suav mus rau kaum thiab ua pa. Koj yuav tau txais kev cawmdim los ntawm kev nyob ntsiag to xwb, zoo li Carlson tau sau.
"Koj puas xav noj?" - “Tsis muaj”. "Peb puas yuav mus taug kev?" - “Tsis muaj”. “Tej zaum wb ua si? Pw tsaug zog? Peb puas yuav kos? Cia peb nyeem phau ntawv? " -" Tsis yog, tsis yog thiab tsis muaj dua. " Tus me nyuam tam sim hloov mus ua tus neeg tsis yog. Thiab yuav ua li cas txaus siab rau nws tsis meej.
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Raws li txoj cai, lub sijhawm tsis lees paub qhia tias tus menyuam pib qhia nws "Kuv". Qhov no yog qhov raug rau cov menyuam hnub nyoog 2,5 txog 3 xyoos. Tom qab ntawd lawv paub lawv tus kheej tus kheej thiab sim ua kom yeej lawv qhov chaw hauv tsev neeg.
Yuav ua li cas?
Tsis txhob sim txwv "tus ntsuj plig ntxeev siab" ntawm tus menyuam, es muab sijhawm rau nws los txiav txim siab. Piv txwv li, cia nws xaiv seb yuav hnav dab tsi rau qib pib. Tom qab ntawd tus menyuam yuav pib ntseeg koj ntau dua thiab muaj kev ntseeg tus kheej ntau dua.
2. Nug qhov qub ib zaug ntxiv
Ib leej niam txiav txim siab suav pes tsawg zaus nws tus menyuam yuav hais lo lus "vim li cas" hauv ib hnub. Kuv yuav tus nias thiab txhua lub sijhawm kuv nias lub pob thaum nws muab lwm lo lus nug. Tau tshwm sim 115 zaug. Koj, ib yam, tau paub txog qhov xwm txheej thaum tus menyuam tsis muaj qhov kawg nug tib lo lus nug thiab txhua lub sijhawm xav tau koj cov lus teb lossis tshuaj tiv thaiv? Tus cwj pwm no tuaj yeem tsav txawm tias cov niam txiv mob siab tshaj plaws. Thiab sim tsis teb! Kev txaj muag tsis tuaj yeem zam tau.
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Kev rov ua dua yog txoj hauv kev zoo tshaj plaws kom nco qab thaum siv lo lus siv thiab nws lub ntsiab lus hloov pauv nyob ntawm qhov xwm txheej. Ib qho ntxiv, qhov no yog yuav ua li cas tus menyuam ua si nrog lub suab nrov thiab suab nrov hauv kev hais tawm.
Yuav ua li cas?
Nco qab lo lus paj lug "Rov ua dua yog niam txoj kev kawm", ua siab ntev thiab tham nrog koj tus menyuam me ntsis ntxiv. Tsis ntev los sis tom qab, lub sijhawm no yuav dhau mus, thiab koj qhov kev tsis zoo yav tom ntej tuaj yeem tsim teeb meem.
3. Tsaug ntau zaus thaum hmo ntuj
Koj tus menyuam puas ua raws li kev tswj hwm yam tsis zoo, tab sis tam sim ntawd pib sawv ntawm peb thaum sawv ntxov nrog kua muag? Zam koj tus kheej, qhov tshwm sim no tuaj yeem ncua sijhawm.
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Kev pw tsaug zog tsis zoo feem ntau cuam tshuam nrog kev xav lossis cov ntaub ntawv tau txais thaum nruab hnub. Yog tus menyuam tsis xav tsaug zog, nws txhais tau tias thaum yav tsaus ntuj nws tau ntsib qee yam kev xav ntawm kev npau taws. Kev kawm cov txuj ci tshiab kuj tseem tuaj yeem ua rau muaj kev kub ntxhov ntau dhau.
Yuav ua li cas?
Txhawm rau pib nrog, hloov tag nrho tus menyuam cov dej num mus rau thawj ib nrab hnub. Thiab yog tias nws tseem tsis tau pw hmo ntuj, ces tsis txhob vwm. Tsuas yog siv sijhawm me ntsis nrog nws. Qhov kev zoo siab yuav dhau mus, thiab tus menyuam yuav tsaug zog.
4. Tsis kam ua raws li lub sijhawm tsis zoo tshaj plaws
Tsis muaj lub sijhawm tsim nyog rau kev txaj muag txhua. Tab sis qee zaum qee yam tsis zoo tshwj xeeb. Piv txwv li, koj yuav tsum coj koj tus menyuam mus kawm qib pib thiab maj mus ua haujlwm. Tab sis nws categorically tsis pom zoo nrog qhov no. Es tsis txhob nyob ntsiag to sib sau ua ke, nws cuam tshais, qw, khiav ncig lub tsev thiab tsis xav txhuam nws cov hniav. Tsis yog lub sijhawm zoo tshaj plaws rau kev ua yeeb yam, puas yog?
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Raws li kws paub txog kev puas siab ntsws John Gottman, pab menyuam yog kev hu lawv ua si. Rau cov menyuam yaus, kev ua si yog txoj hauv kev tseem ceeb ntawm kev kawm txog lub ntiaj teb. Yog li, yog tias thaum sawv ntxov nws sawv los ntawm lub zog thiab tsis xav ua txhua yam raws li txoj kev npaj, tom qab ntawd tsis txhob liam nws. Tom qab tag nrho, cov phiaj xwm tau ua los ntawm koj, tsis yog nws.
Yuav ua li cas?
Kho koj lub sijhawm. Tej zaum koj yuav tsum tau sawv ntxov ua si nrog koj tus menyuam. Yog tias qhov kev txiav txim siab no tsis haum koj, tom qab ntawd tso tseg yam tsawg 15-20 feeb rau koj tus menyuam ua si thaum sawv ntxov.
Hnub no koj tsis tso cai rau koj tus menyuam saib cov duab tas lauv, nws pib quaj thiab quaj, yog li koj kuj tau rau txim rau nws rau tus cwj pwm tsis zoo. Los yog, piv txwv li, lawv muab porridge rau pluas tshais, thiab nws, nws hloov tawm, xav tau nplej zom.
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Nco ntsoov, tej zaum nag hmo tus menyuam saib cov duab tas luav rau peb teev, vim tias koj xav tau sijhawm? Lossis puas yog koj ib txwm tsis txaus siab pom zoo ua lwm yam? Cov menyuam yaus ib txwm nco txog cov cai ntawm kev ua si, tshwj xeeb yog cov uas nyiam lawv. Yog li lawv chim siab thiab tsis nkag siab thaum cov cai hloov pauv.
Yuav ua li cas?
Thaum nws los txog rau kev txwv, suav nrog cov laj thawj. Yog tias hnub no nws tsis yooj yim sua, tag kis nws tsis yooj yim sua, thiab ib txwm nws tsis yooj yim sua. Thiab yog tias koj tuaj yeem ua tau, koj yuav tsum mob siab rau koj tus kheej, lossis hloov "yog" mus rau "tsis" maj mam.
Ib rooj plaub uas zoo li qub: tus me nyuam yaus muab lub txiv mis tso rau hauv pem teb thiab quaj kom txog thaum nws rov qab los. Thiab qhov no tau rov ua ntau dua ib zaug. Thiab tsis yog ob. Ntau kaum leej!
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Ua ntej, menyuam yaus nquag coj tus cwj pwm tsis zoo. Lawv tsis tuaj yeem tswj lawv tus kheej ib yam li peb ua - lawv lub hlwb tseem tsis tau tsim los. Qhov thib ob, kev muab cov khoom pov tseg yog qhov txuj ci zoo uas cov menyuam yuav tsum xyaum. Nrog nws, lawv txhim kho cov txuj ci zoo hauv lub cev thiab kev sib koom tes ntawm ob txhais tes thiab ob lub qhov muag. Qhov thib peb, thaum tus menyuam poob qee yam, nws kawm txog qhov ua rau muaj mob (yog tias koj tso nws tseg, nws yuav poob).
Yuav ua li cas?
Sim piav qhia yam twg tuaj yeem ua tau thiab yuav tsum tsis txhob poob. Cov menyuam yaus muaj peev xwm txaus los ua cov ntaub ntawv no thaum ntxov li ob xyoos.
Thaum xub thawj, tus menyuam txaus siab rau qhov qab los noj mov zoo, thiab tom qab ntawd mam li pib tso zaub mov rau ntawm lub phaj, thiab nws cov tais diav nyiam tsis nyiam nws ntxiv lawm.
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Cov kws kho menyuam yaus txheeb xyuas ntau yam laj thawj uas ua rau tsis qab los: qaug zog, ua hniav, lossis tsuas yog xav ua si. Ib qho ntxiv, kev hloov pauv hauv kev noj zaub mov tuaj yeem cuam tshuam rau tus menyuam lub siab nyiam. Cov menyuam yaus tau khaws cia hauv lawv cov zaub mov thiab cov zaub mov tshiab tuaj yeem ua rau lawv ntshai.
Yuav ua li cas?
Tsis txhob yuam koj tus menyuam noj yog tias lawv tsis xav tau. Thaum muaj hnub nyoog ob xyoos, lawv twb kawm to taub thaum lawv puv lossis xav noj. Nws yog qhov zoo dua los qhia tus menyuam rau cov khoom tshiab maj mam, kom nws muaj sijhawm los siv rau lawv.
Kev npau taws tam sim yog niam txiv txoj kev npau suav phem. Thaum xub thawj, menyuam yaus quaj kom tau txais yam lawv xav tau, tab sis tom qab ntawd lawv tsuas yog tswj tsis tau. Nws tseem phem dua yog tias txhua qhov no tau tshwm sim hauv qhov chaw pej xeem, thiab tus menyuam yuav luag tsis tuaj yeem ua rau siab nqig.
Yuav ua li cas tshwm sim?
Cov laj thawj rau kev mob siab ntsws khiav tob dua li nws zoo li. Tus menyuam nkees lossis muaj kev xav ntau dhau, lossis tej zaum tshaib plab, ntxiv rau koj tseem tsis tau muab nws yam nws xav tau. Ib tus neeg laus tuaj yeem tiv nrog nws txoj kev xav, tab sis lub paj hlwb ntawm cov menyuam tseem tsis tau tsim. Yog li ntawd, txawm tias kev nyuab siab me me tuaj yeem hloov mus rau qhov xwm txheej.
Yuav ua li cas?
Thaum nws los txog rau kev npau taws, sim tham nrog tus menyuam lossis hloov nws qhov kev xav yog twb tsis muaj txiaj ntsig. Zoo dua tos thiab cia nws nyob twj ywm, tab sis tsis ua qhov kev pom zoo. Thiab dab tsi yog cov kws kho kev puas siab ntsws xav txog qhov no, koj tuaj yeem nyeem NTAWV.
Ib pawg kws tshawb fawb Asmeskas tau tshawb fawb thiab pom tias kev nyeem ntawv nrov tau cuam tshuam rau lub siab lub ntsws ntawm cov menyuam. Raws li nws tshwm sim, cov txheej txheem hauv lub hlwb uas tshwm sim thaum tus menyuam mloog cov dab neeg muaj feem cuam tshuam nrog nws lub peev xwm los tswj kev xav. Yog li ntawd, cov menyuam uas niam thiab txiv nyeem ntawv nrov rau lawv ua rau lawv tsis muaj zog.